For you, my son...

Dearest Gabriel Riley,

Today is Thanksgiving Day, November 24th, 2011. You are officially 6 days overdue... so I thought I would take these moments when you're not in my arms to write a letter to you.

Son, (it feels so surreal to think that you're my son) on a day where "thanks" is celebrated, I want you to know how thankful I am for you. You have enriched my life so much already... and you're not even here yet! Son, there are many things I want to tell you. That I love you so much already that it's unbelievable. That I can't wait to meet you. That I often imagine what you look like, whether you'll have daddy's eyes and smile or be a wonderful combination of the two of us. I wonder who you're going to be, whether you'll grow up and love reading and learning, like me... or inherit your dad's amazing musical talents.

These are the things I wonder when you're moving around in my stomach. Like you are right now.

As far as my pregnancy with you is concerned, you really gave me an easy time. I didn't get very sick, I didn't have any complications-- being pregnant with you was a complete joy. It's only been these past few days that have been frustrating. Your daddy and I want you to be here so badly it's been hard to see these days pass without seeing you, darling.

As much as your daddy and I love you, you need to know that there are so many people who love you just as much already as well. You have a great, great grandmother (which is unheard of nowadays), two sets of great grandparents and grandparents, an amazing auntie, another aunt, uncle, and two cousins, as well as many, many second cousins and other people who are dying to meet you. Daddy and I have tried everything we can to coax you out, but nothing has worked. So now we're on God's timing and yours, sweet boy.

It's so strange to think that God already knows you and that He already has your whole life planned out. No doubt He has amazing plans for you, little one. Before the beginning of time He knew when you would be born, who you would be, and that you would be ours. That you would be mine. My only prayer is that you always love Him and put Him first in your life. If nothing else I hope for you comes true, if you love God and love people your life will be full and your daddy and I will be incredibly proud of you.

Gabriel, I can't promise that I'll always be the best mom. Honestly, the thought of being a mom scares me to death. Not because of you, sweet one, but because I see so many deficiencies in myself. But I do promise, in spite of my shortcomings, that I will love you unconditionally and, when I make them, (which I'm sure I will) to learn from my mistakes. Your Grandma and Grandpa have been great examples to me, so hopefully I will be able to emulate them in how I raise you.

Sweetheart, I will end this letter with hope, because every good thing ends with hope. I hope you know how much your daddy and I love you. And I hope to see you soon.

All my love,
Mama.