An unfitting sentiment

97 days never seemed (or felt) they could last so long...

In a way I wish it was me getting married today and I'm ever so slightly jealous it's not. I mean, I'm happy for Rich and Melissa, it's just... I wish I could go to sleep tonight in Ben's arms and wake up beside him tomorrow morning. I wish I could live with him and go home to him. I want to so badly... But, in a way, I'm glad it's not our wedding today. Who knows that we'll learn about our lives and each other in the days between now and then? Who knows what God has in store for us?

Still, even though I realize this... the days stretch years and I'm holding on, praying for the lingering promise in front of me. So I'll wait in eager anticipation of my between-time... and soon, it'll be my turn. Our turn.

Gibralter

Our words waltz elegantly
Around the eggshells of a "yes" or "no."
A simple answer will either anchor me here
Or release me to go.

You taught me to fight for what I believe in
Well, I believe in you.
But I refuse to settle for mediocrity
and the facade of divded loyalty.
I don't believe that's all He has for you and me.
So, give me your whole heart or let me leave.

"A house divided will fall," they say,
And my heart is breaking against the wall I'm crushed against
As you push me away
I try to get through to you, to make you understand
But the other voices drown out mine,
Leaving me with bleeding heart and outstretched hands.

You taught me to fight for what I believe in
Well, I believe that you're the one for me
But, I refuse to settle for mediocrity
And the facade of divided loyalty.
I know that's not what He desires for you and me.
Give me your whole heart, because I don't want to leave.

Deciding between your wants and our needs
I know the choice is unbearable
But I support you and trust you won't falter
as you're stuck in your personal Gibralter.