... Do you ever feel like you're the worst version of yourself? And you know for a fact that you are transforming into this version, however, you're powerless to stop the onslaught of hideousness?
That was me tonight.
Sometimes I look at myself and I see so, so many things I don't like. Most of which I've come to terms with, some that still sting, and some that I've chosen to ignore and are finally surfacing. I look at those things and see them change me into a terrible person, a person that snaps at her wonderful fiance unduly, and I don't like myself. I don't like myself at all.
But he still loves me.
I don't understand it. I don't see how he can unconditionally love the person I don't even like sometimes. And that's how I know he's an example of God's love for me.
I have to get better. I can't let little things affect me so much. And I will get better... He's a blessing to me and I'll be better because he deserves the best I can give him. My very best.
That was me tonight.
Sometimes I look at myself and I see so, so many things I don't like. Most of which I've come to terms with, some that still sting, and some that I've chosen to ignore and are finally surfacing. I look at those things and see them change me into a terrible person, a person that snaps at her wonderful fiance unduly, and I don't like myself. I don't like myself at all.
But he still loves me.
I don't understand it. I don't see how he can unconditionally love the person I don't even like sometimes. And that's how I know he's an example of God's love for me.
I have to get better. I can't let little things affect me so much. And I will get better... He's a blessing to me and I'll be better because he deserves the best I can give him. My very best.
(Just for the record, I apologize for anyone who actually checks this and has sorely missed my off brand blog stylings in the past month... I'm coming off my hiatus. Feel free to rejoice.)
